27 November 2005

appreciating small thing

never really realise the importance of jaw, or acknolewdge its existence..till now.

Had a minor oral surgery done on me last thursday, to remove my partially erupted lower wisdom tooth. Its not functioning, and was angulated in such a way that makes it unable to erupt fully in to arch. It impinges to the adjacent tooth, creating food impaction area..causing more problems. Not wanting to deal with it any further,i finally decided to have it removed, get it over once and for all. And because of its abnormal position, it cant be extracted through the usual extraction, need to be taken out by a procedure called 'minor oral surgery'..( rsnya pernah cerita psl ni sblm ni kan..). Meanings that it involves some incision to the part of the gum, to create an opening, section the tooth, might need some removal of bone ..and take the tooth out, and lastly, suture the gum back. It was not as bad as it sounds..

It just that the post-op experiences which are more dreadful. The complications that i must and currently are facing. The swelling up of the left jaw, the inability to open my mouth big enough to eat (more else talk), the pain and redness due to some inflammation..all signs and symptoms that are expected after the procedure. Got 2 days MC, bought loads of ice packs, stuffed it in my friend's fridge..and my activity for the past 2-3 days was putting the ice packs over the inflammed jaw...to reduce the swelling. How bad is the swelling..? hmm..how to say it..it looks as if a ping-pong ball is constantly inside my mouth, specifically situated at the left jaw, bulging out creating an asymmetrical size of the both jaws. Yup..quite like it.

the feeling of unattractiveness is one thing (hate to admit this, but yeah..), but the feeling of not being able to talk normally, not to mention laugh..was more depressing. I stayed in my room, with ice packs glued mostly to my cheek, lying on the bed, reading or watching cds. Dreading the thought of going out or walking around, as ppl are taking double looks at me. Yeah..i know, ..it looks weird alright, and funny too, in a way..but,..please dont stare. Some symphatetic ppl even offered some 'petua' to help reduce the 'bengkak', which i accepted gratefully, but not brave enuff to do so..( hey..muka nih, tak kena gaya petua, lain plak jdnya..heheh). But..thanks. Friends helped a lot, trying to cheer me up by saying words like.." takdelah bengkak sgt..ok je,.." or.." cute apa, bengkak sebelah muka, Lebih cute kalau bengkak dua2 belah..terus jd 'cherubism'..haha".Gee, thanks. My biggest problem was to hold back my laughter when some jokes are made ,..knowing my weakness, i stayed away from any laughter-causing medium, be it jokes or comedies. That's among the reason of me not going home to spend the weekend, as all my dear siblings are masters in making me doubling over with laughter.

But..it makes me realise and appreciate my jaw. ( ..how many of us here ever terlintas utk be grateful that we have perfectly normal jaw..?). As i think about it, yes..i never really think about my jaw, more else to be grateful or care about it. Until now...until im unable to open my mouth big enough to insert a spoon, not able to chew normally, not able to laugh or smile easily.( and prettily..=/). When right at this moment, i am salivating hungrily over burgers and nasi goreng kampung, but unable to eat until the wound is compeletely healed. When my left jaw is bigger than its right..and then i realised, how wonderfully , perfectly fine and functioning my jaws are, not to mention it's main purpose in creating our face features, plus holding all our teeth. Thank you Allah..for creating our jaws !

So..ppl..wish me well ya..=]. And let us be grateful for all things, ..whatever things..in our hands, in our life. It might be small, insignificant or unimportant to us now, but lose it, or when it's unable to function normally ..then only we'll realise that we can't live without it, and began desperately praying for it.

oklah..actually, im on my way to buy more ice packs, saw the internet room lights on, and here i am, knocking on the keyboard. ( tak peduli dh mata2 org yg memandang my dear swelled jaw nih..ehhe. anyway..it's much better now..). Dan sgt lapar..sbb makan pun terkial2 je..iskks..sabarlah skett, org lain yg permanently deformed lebih ramai kat dunia nih, dan lebih hebat ujian dia dr aku ...


p/s : biasa tak dgr org kata.." tak ada 5 sen tu, tak cukup seringgit ! .." .Hehe...bukan apa, sbb sesetgh org nih, buat nampak tak nampak je dgn duit 5 sen, mentang2lah 5 sen je nilainya ehh, nak buat telefon tak boleh, nak masuk vendor machine air pun tak boleh..dahlah saiznya kecik je. Tapi ada nilai tau..kerana takde 5 sen, tak cukup seringgit!


ghoyye said...

reading your latest entry made me go 'ouch! that's gotta hurt!' :) anyway, get well soon aightt? ;)

justme said...

ehhe..thanks..much better now...=]

find it quite funny, looking at ppl's expression when they talk to me, pretending not to notice the bulging jaw.., must be very disturbing ehh.., but i really appreciate their effort..ehhe..