24 February 2006

buzzing stories

gossips can be troublesome smtmes..=/

rumours, gossips..stories that fled from mouth to mouth, be it from ppl around us to strangers...it might not affect u physically, but it can cause slight worriness. Thinking to urself,.." apalah org2 ni semua pikir ttg aku agaknye?". And there'll be some worried voices in ur head, thinking that this 'silly' stories going around might close ur doors of opportunity to some ppl. Ppl u dont mind being 'gossiped' to..ehhe.

i used to be sooo 'runsing' and 'risau' about these issues back during school years. Bimbang apa org fikir. Takut pandangan org... macam2lah...which smtmes made my life miserable and not-happy. Gossip kanak2 zaman sekolah pun nak kutip risau fikir..apa lah..

ive learnt..that the best way, is to ignore. buat 'dek' and muka 'takde perasaan'. Mulut manusia..macam tulah. I alwys believe, that 'it takes two to tango'..and..'to clap we need both hands'. As long as i know where i stand, what im doing and who i am, ..knowing the actual truth amidst the questions and evident-less news heard by ppl, i know ill be alright. And besides..'actions always speak louder than words'..

The least i could do is to correct the myth when it is presented to me upfront. I dont care about what other ppl think, as some of them mean nothing to me, some dont have tht much significance or importance to my life ..but to certain ppl, yes.. i do mind. Ppl whom i dont see as 'nothing'. Ppl i want to know better, and wish to be known better too. To this ppl, whatever it is..ask me directly, as i will answer.

the rest..suka hatilah nak pikir apa pun..

oh yeah..ehheh ( muka sheepish..)..im much better now, yeah..,the pressure and stressful environment wont subside until exams over..but then, not to write..? ermm, i think it'll make me more boiled up with depression inside. So..here i am..writing in here...=]

" what you are thunders so loudly that i cannot hear what u say to the contrary.." Ralph Waldo Emerson.

22 February 2006

life not good...=/.isks...

..never been this stressed out before. and when everything and everyone is rushing for their life, unconsciously, we become bitter, selfish, inconsiderate..in other word, we become a terrible person. We hurt ppl's feelings, we treat them like dirt.

i dont think ill be able to write as often as before in the next few weeks. So much thing on my mind, yet so little time. Had this sudden idea to start a new blog after exam's over...hmm

Please...pray for me yea..i really need all the prayers in the world. And im taking this opportunity too, to apologise for any wrong words, or any entries written which have hurt anyone. The tendency to talk and write without much thinking done,,...( sigh)..

so..all the best to everyone in whatever u do. Never give up hopes, and im still not giving up mine..!

20 February 2006

to plan or not to plan

when u dont have a plan for ur life, ur future..how u want it to be in the next 3 yrs time. Or where u want to be in 5 yrs time. Or who u want to see urself be in 10 yrs time.

i dont even have a plan for my tomorrow...=/. isks.

seriously...i dont. Huaaa...and i think that's the cause to much of my dilemma or indecisiveness, because i just dont know what i want, not sure of the path im taking since i have no definite destination in mind. NAzz..?!!!

I do have dreams. Many of it to be exact. But the difference between a 'dream' and a 'plan' is, when u plan for sthg, u work towards making it a reality, like u plan to buy a car by Sept this year. u will begin by saving money and learning to drive from now. But a dream, ermm...it's just like u are sitting dreamily on a couch, dreaming without doing anything to make that dream a reality. Gee..like that thing u dreamt about will fall on ur lap with that sight of u smiling stupidly dreaming nonsense...

where do i want to be in the next 3 yrs time? Who i want to be 5 yrs from now? What achievements, improvements, successes in my hands 10 yrs from now..? Ermm.. Like how many childrens will i have by tht time,..ehehhe => ..ermm..let see, 3 boys , 2 girls maybe.., or maybe more, or..maybe im already a specialist by tht time, or enthusiastically teaching in university, and then coming back home every evening and spend my time with husband and family,and every weekend we'll go ...
Erm,jap.. hold on there a sec. Naz...that's not planning, that's dreaming. Wake up and start planning!!!!!! =!

sheeshh...plan ur life. seriously...plan ur life.

19 February 2006


.." islam itu mudah, lagi memudahkan.."

Aku ada seorg kenalan..( ermm, not really kenalan,xdelah kenal sgt pun..how to say it..kenalan lah..). This guy, the kind that pada aku, need some 'help'.. a help that has to come from himself. To go and seek the truth, utk jd org yg lebih berfikir..dan bukan ikut dan main terima je bulat2. Tapi, susah nak ckp dgn org, krn tak semua org sama, dikurniakan peluang utk belajar dan kefahaman. Faktor latarbelakang, taraf pendidikan, sosio-ekonomi..etc, environmental factor yg membentuk pemikiran dan personaliti seseorg. Keterbukaan kita dlm berfikir dan menimbangkan sesuatu perkara. Faham ke apa aku cuba cakap..?

"..Saya sentiasa berdoa pd Tuhan, agar jadikanlah saya ni org miskin dan tak berharta.."
"..Saya pergi sembahyang raya, semua org tengok saya. Sbb saya pakai baju koyak-rabak. Buat apa pakai lawa2, ..nanti mendatangkan rasa bangga diri dan riya' dlm hati.."
"...Nabi tak suka pakai warna terang2 ni..."
Astaghfirullah..inilah dia pemahaman yg silap, konsep yg salah..yg menjadikan Islam ni nampak mundur, 'bodoh dan lemah'..hina di mata org. Dan yg menyedihkan lagi, org yg berfahaman seperti ini, seorg pendakwah bebas yg menyebarkan fahaman yg tak betul ni kepada org2 yg baru berjinak2 nak faham agama. Lantas..kesan dan akibatnya...yg tak tahu terus tak tahu, yg salah fhm akan lebih keliru.

Masalahnya, bila manusia merasakan dia-lah yg betul dan benar, pandangan org lain salah. Cara hidup org 'kaya dan berharta' ni berdosa. Bila terlalu ramai org dabik dada mengaku ilmuwan ISlam, 'alim ulamak dalam hal2 agama...sehingga tak mahu ditegur dan buka hati dan minda sendiri.Bukankah Islam menganjurkan kita sentiasa memajukan diri dan terus menuntut ilmu. Bukan dh habis baca satu kitab, terus dakwa diri hebat. Aku tak boleh nak ckp bnyk dgn dia ni, sbb panas hati. Geram dgn sikap 'bodoh sombong', tapi dlm masa kesiankan dia jugak. Bila nak maju kalau berfikiran begitu.

Kerana fahaman2 yg silap seperti ini, Islam org tak hormat. Kerana org2 begini, yg lebih mengambil berat hal titik-bengik, dan bukannya isu2 yg lebih penting dan pokok seperti mencari jalan utk menjadi Islam yg lebih disegani..lahirlah golongan yg 'taksub' tak tentu hala, yg mana malangnya golongan2 begini yg lebih disuluh media. Dan akhirannya..Islam jugak yg diserong pandang.

Hidup di dunia seterbaik mungkin, kerana Tuhan tidak ciptakan kita dengan sia-sia. Kehidupan di dunia adalah untuk mencari bekalan ke akhirat. Tuhan tak larang hamba-Nya mencari harta,asalkan jalannya tidak salah dan rezeki yg dicari halal. Sekiranya kita dikurniakan Tuhan harta kemewahan, kita bersyukur dan kita gunakan untuk menjadi manusia yg lebih baik dan dapat membantu manusia lain dgn kelebihan yg kita ada. Sekiranya kita dilahirkan miskin dan susah, redha dan bersyukur jugak, krn msh ada org yg jauhh lebih susah dr kita, dan terus berusaha dgn kudrat yg ada utk majukan diri dan keluarga.( im telling this mostly to myself nih..)

Muslim yg lebih baik antara kamu, ialah yg dapat memberi kemudahan ( membantu ) manusia lain..- err,.. nanti aku check balik, x sure plak full sentence nye..lebih kurg mcm nilah maksud dia.

"...Kalau kita ni bukan orang yg kaya raya atau mewah, cukuplah kita hidup dengan tidak menyusahkan orang lain.." - ayah.

14 February 2006

why so 'blue'..?

feeling blue....hmm. dunno what's wrong with me, ..keep drifting to 'dreamland'...

it rained heavily today, with lightnings that woke me up from my afternoon sleep. A wake from God, as i haven't perform my Zohor prayers yet..And later, spend the entire evening with Harry Potter, laughing at the wits and enjoying the wonderful adventure of wizardry. ( Naz,naz..u still can 'goyang2' ur kaki mehh..? )

interview went well. Unexpectedly too easy and smooth i must say, as we were warned about the 'worst' cases and experiences, and we got ourselves prepared for this day mcmlah nak ambil exam. (a friend of mine siap gi beli buku 'Malaysia Kita'..now that's seriously serious..eheh). But, today..everything was totally different from what was told to us by the 'juru-taklimat' ( which i thought was really exaggerating this whole interview stuffs, ...what, trying to scare us agaknye..?). The interviewers were very kind ppl,( 'veteran' ppl who reminds me very much of my own father ) asking simple questions about ourselves, teased me playfully about my reluctance to be posted to sab & swak. ( ehhe..couldn't pretend my 'tak nak' expression,..maaflah DAtuk.. i had other plans in mind..;] ). Almost all the minutes spent listening to him giving me wise words, advising me to be a good human being, not to be arrogant and serve the nation as a good civilian. Basically, i was nodding like an obedient daughter throughout the interview session as he did most of the talking. But..alhamdulillah...whatever the result of this, i know it would be the best ., yeap, the odds are against me, looking at the slim chances for me to get my choices granted.

not that i despise 'sabah & swak' that much, not at all. Cuma, dlm kepala, mcm2 plan ada. Nak berada hampir dgn keluarga esp parents not due to 'manja-ness' or what, but more because i know that it would make them very happy, being surrounded with their anak2. And most importantly, that would be the only time i have, to really be their daughter. To be there for them, spend time together etc. Before the time comes,when ill be someone's wife and only Allah knows, where ill be starting my new life later. It's the cycle of life, im not complaining, knowing that's how life is ..it just that, as long as i can use the time i have, and the opportunity to make choices..ermm, ill try my best to do what i could.

and besides..=]... it's about time for me to really seriously thinking about my life. About ending this 'single-hood' life of mine and embark on a new journey. A new life. insyaAllah..

12 February 2006

love talks 2

A friend asked me to write a poem about love. Actually, he asked me to do it months ago, but I was unable to make it. Not because of time, but more because I just don’t know how. Where to start, what to tell. To write a poem, to make it meaningful that it can touch the hearts of those who read it, that what makes it difficult. To create something beautiful, that comes from the heart.

Some ppl worship love, see it as sthg sacred, invincibly strong that only death could tear it apart. ( im referring to love between man and woman here.) Cinta itu agung, kata Laila Majnun. CInta yang membuat Romeo kelihatan hero apabila mati kerana Juliet. Cinta yang sangat hingga wujud ungkapan seperti ‘lautan api sanggup kurenangi’. Kisah cinta yang melahirkan seloka berbunyi, ‘ Buang emak buang saudara, Kerana kasih hamba turutkan’. Hebatnya cinta kalau begitu.

But the more I understand life, I come to realise that love is just merely a feeling, that can come and go anytime. One can feel so deeply in love today, but the feeling becomes lesser, some might even vanished without trace when hatred and resentment started to fill in the space. Why? Why a feeling that was once so strong, so worshipped can slowly fade away? Because it’s only a feeling. Perasaan manusia yg tidak kekal, seperti tidak kekalnya manusia itu sendiri. Ive wrote before in the ‘deleted blog’ about ‘sifat kebolehubahan hati’. Knowing the nature of heart, in order to retain love, it needs hard work, it needs persistent reminder, it needs faith, trust, respect and responsibility. But most important it needs blessings from the Giver of love itself. Blessings from Allah.

Because HE is the provider, the creator, the owner of us. HE gives to whom He wishes, HE also can take it back. To get love, to keep love, raise our hands up and pray to Him, for HE surely listens and answers. Cinta itu anugerah Tuhan. Cinta tak wujud jika Dia tak izinkan. Jadi..untuk mengekalkan cinta agar kukuh sepanjang zaman, pada Dia kita minta dan pohonkan. Mungkin juga, cinta jadi goyah dan hina, kerana jalan untuk mendapatkan cinta itu sendiri tidak diredhai-Nya.

I really like a phrase from one of M Nasir’s songs. Listen and understand its meaning, then perhaps we can appreciate and understand love better. “ ..mari mawar ku , raikan cinta, tanpa cinta - NYA kita tiada. Mawar cinta mawar ku abadi, cinta Pemilik segala jadi..” – RAIKAN CINTA.

Love is a wonderful feeling, and I believe it’s a human desire to love and be loved back in return. Because we are created in pairs, we can never really be able to live normal being alone in this world. So…ppl, every day, every moments..our whole life, let’s be grateful to have ppl who love us and we love them back. Thank you Alllah, for this gift of love….let’s celebrate love!!!

( another song written by M Nasir, he’s a real music-sifu..=])

Bila hadir kasih sayang
Tanda cinta sudah berakar
Terkadang pudar hidupku
Terkadang semangat gelora

Rasa cinta kepada keindahan
Yang ada yang peka pada kejadian
Berdiri di atas kehendak keamanan

Cinta menciptakan rindu
Juga membuat kita sendu
Semangat terbakar hangus
Hidup mesti terus

Kerana cinta dunia pun berperang
Itu cinta sesat di perjalanan
Demi cinta kita terlupa dunia

Marilah kita bersama terus bercinta
Menjadi cermin untuk manusia
Hentikan tangisan rindukan ketenangan
Cinta ini penuh keindahan
Kasih dan sayang….

08 February 2006

the tittle? ,,dunno-lah,

Know why ‘surprises’ can make us so happy that smtmes tears welled between smiles ? Because it is unexpected. We don’t expect it coming, and suddenly ‘the surprised thing’ is handed before our eyes, and we went…speechless. Unable to say a word due to shocked, happiness and touched. The feeling of joy is different because we don’t expect to get it, like a hidden gift from God, it falls straight into our lap. .

It’s different when we know that we will get the thing or when we asked for it. The feeling of happiness is there alright, but…different. How to say it…hmm…like opening the door one morning and found a small parcel hanging at the doorknob. It’s not ur birthday, or anniversary, or any special occasion which u know u’ll be getting sthg today and silently anticipating a gift coming urself ( eventhough we usually modestly voiced out “ tak pyhlah, buat susah2 je..”, but secretly , we actually do hope for sthg. Because it’s our birthday, or a special day of ours..hehe), but that small gift hanging at the doorknob able to create extreme happiness. Beyond words. Because it is unexpected.

And it hurts when u expected sthg, and it didn’t happen. Or when ur colleagues at workplace keep flattering u by saying that the post of asst manager is ‘confirmed’ in ur hand due to..blabla..( words of praises that make u beamed proudly like tomato ), and suddenly ur boss gave it to someone else. It hurts even more, like hurt-plus-embarrased-plus-upset, but u have to keep a happy face and smiling along, congratulating the new ‘asst manager’. Not because u are angry that u didn’t get the post, or mad at the new ‘asst manager’ or whatever, but because u already kind of thinking that u’ll get it, because of the expectations blabbed to ur ears by ppl around u.

Like what ‘Cinta’ felt, in a scene from ‘Ada Apa Dengan CInta’, when she was the one expected to bagged the prize in the poetry competition. Her name was chanted by the crowds, she was already happily and shyly smiling and enjoying the cheers, and then, ‘Rangga’ name was announced as the winner. (Fuuh..i really understand the feeling now). At that moment, u don’t know whether u are sad because u didn’t win, or angry to the ppl who‘ve been flattering u with expectations of winning and making u kind of hope to win, or embarrassed because u was the one ppl said would win and yet u lose. Do u get my point? Nevermind…

What Im trying to say is that, don’t flatter me by praises or words of expectations like ill be the one bringing back the prize or ill be the one crowned as the beauty queen or ill be the one chosen as the best singer etc2. And keep teasing playfully to my ears statements like." Eleh, ull win punya, .” or "okay2..siap sedia nak gi ambil hadiah..” .I don’t know, their intentions is harmless, but it gives the pressure, and the embarrasment and the frustration boiling in me when I didn’t get or win all those things they said ill do. And if they think I like being praised and hearing them ‘flattering’ me like that, no, I don’t. I don’t like it one bit. I hated it. It makes me too hopeful, overly confident, happily anticipating and expecting to win. And when I didn’t, I hate the feeling I would feel after it.

let life be the way it is, unexpected...like it better tht way.

06 February 2006

aku, kau berbeza

antara perkara yg kita tak berupaya untuk kawal, atau perlakukan agar mengikut kehendak kita ialah perwatakan atau personaliti manusia lain. Ayat yg aku selalu sebut.." lain orang, lain lah kan..". Sekali-sekala akan tercabar kesabaran, akan berlaku terasa hati, tersinggung, dan kdg2 mungkin menyebabkan terdetik dlm hati, yg kita lebih baik dari dia..( which sgtlah tak baik utk fikir mcm ni kann..).Walau mcmana kita nak jaga hati kita, perasaan kita..kdg2 ter'jejas' jugak..kerana kita pun manusia.

once, mama pernah ckp.." jgn cepat nak mengatakan org2 yg masam muka, bengis dan kasar, sebagai tak baik, atau merasakan kita ni lebih baik dr mereka. Mungkin mereka pun tak nak begitu. Mungkin mereka pun nak tersenyum jugak, nak jugak ramah bertegur sapa dgn org lain, tapi karekter mereka yg kasar dan dingin menjadikan mereka tidak begitu mudah dirapati. Perangai adlh sesuatu yg sukar nak diubah dlm sehari dua, ..". Setiap kali aku berhadapan dgn org2 begini, aku akan teringat kata2 mama ni, jadi aku takkan terasa hati atau bersangka buruk dgn dia. Kadang2 aku akan fikir, sebenarnya org ni nak senyum kat aku, nak buat baik pd aku, tapi cuma dh mmg perangai dia macam tu..jd , biar jelah..It will make me feel better after that.

Cuma yg buat aku sedikit 'takut', adalah dengan sikap manusia yang lahiriahnya rapat dan baik dengan kita, tapi punya hati yg tidak baik. Aku ingat selama ini hanya dlm drama2 dan novel2 je wujud manusia mcm ni, rupanya sekeliling kita pun ada yg 'luar jernih dlm keruh'. Sedaya upaya kita nak pikir baik ttg dia, nak bersangka baik, tapi..hmm,... apa yg kita boleh buat ialah elakkan dan jauhkan diri dr org mcm ni. Sbb takkan selamat dan takkan bahagia. Manusia yg berdengki, hati penuh iri dan tak puas hati melihat kelebihan atau kejayaan manusia lain..pada aku, org2 begini bahaya dibuat kawan. Bisa 'makan' kita dlm diam.

Dan sepanjang usia aku, ( yg takdelah tua sgt lagi nih..ehhe, ), drpd pengalaman bergaul dan melihat manusia2 lain, sikit2 aku belajar. Dan aku bersyukur sentiasa ada ahli keluarga di sekeliling yg 'guard' aku dr manusia2 dan keadaan yg 'mencurigakan'. Aku sudah belajar, tak semua org yg dabik dada mengaku kawan, adalah 'sebenar kawan'. Aku perlahan2 mengerti, tak semua manusia dalam dunia punya niat baik, tak semua orang kita boleh letakkan kepercayaan dan dunia tak seindah dan se'selamat' yang kita harapkan. Kebaikan yang kita kongsikan dengan manusia lain, tak semestinya mereka memulangkan dalam bentuk yg serupa, kerana manusia berbeza, hati perut kita tak sama. Apa yg kita boleh buat,ialah terus berbuat kebaikan, dan dalam masa yang sama percaya Tuhan sentiasa melindungi dan melimpahkan kita dengan perkara2 baik juga.

How did i get to here..? tulah akibatnya kalau mcm2 yg difikirkan.

hmm..kemahiran 'membaca' niat di sebalik wajah luaran orang nilah yang aku belum mahir, nasib baik ada org2 mahir sekeliling aku yg akan peringatkan..
"... jangan kak, danger!.."

Percaya kepada gut instinct.

perfect match

Where did I get this tittle ? From listening to Mix Fm ‘Perfect Match’. The times when Shazz and Richard will be questioning a couple, to know how well they know one another. First,they would ask the wife, and later asked the husband the same question, to see whether they both give the same answer.Heheh..quite fun. And I would be perching next to the radio waiting to hear the husband’s answer, will it be the same line as his wife..? Hah. Perfect match, indeed. But smtmes, the guys would give a totally different answer from his spouse, that would make his wife screeched in the receiver ( because then they would not get the prize awarded for those who answered all correct ). But what to expect from guys ehh.., they can be plain insensitive about living ppl around them smtmes, …eheh. ( but that what makes a man, a man..;].. )

Perfect match. Sounds too good to be true, except in movies, where ‘soulmates’ exist. ( Yikes..i sound like a cynic who don’t believe in love ) . I do feel happiness blossoming in me, watching happy couples who look just perfect together. Completing one another. ( yeah2..another cliché , mushy romantic sentence taken from ‘Jerry Maguire’ ). Especially old couples, when the streaks of beauty has faded with years, and the strong masculine build were replaced with old, sagging body. But the love remains. The relationship is still there, strong as ever.

Amazing ehh, these old ppl. During the old days, when there were no self-help books, no marriage counseling. No kursus kahwin. No luxury or wealth to go ‘honey-mooning’ to Venice or Paris. And no romantic dialogues learnt from movies. Yet their marriage last a lifetime. Compared to us nowadays who are pampered with all the love tips, yet the love itself crumbled halfway. Declaring to the world what a perfect match we are, and end up hating one another. What is missing there ? Or haven’t we found our ‘perfect match’?

I used to believe that perfect match means we found our soulmates, our so-called ‘the one’. Heh..but after several sessions of brainwashing, i finally come to my senses, that believing in such things is dangerous. It makes us hold to fantasies beliefs and just waiting in despair for ‘the one’ to finally pop-up in front of us. That’s not how life or love works. If u want it, be it and create it. Work for it. Hope all u can, dream all u want, but u have to work and not just sitting around waiting for the ‘soulmate’ to be granted to us.( tau..naz.!!! )

Maybe ‘soulmates’ or perfect match really do exist after all, but it comes after years of staying together, going through hardships and life turbulences, sharing happy moments and laughters, had rows of arguments and crying buckets of tears, and really know one another inside out. And it doesn’t happen overnight, it takes quite a period of time for someone to finally realise that this person next to him/her is their ‘soulmates’. Their perfect match. The one that completes the ‘missing puzzle’ in them. Hmm..

I remember once I was sitting in my parent’s room, watching tv when my father walked in to change his clothes ( just got back from work ). Suddenly he asked me..
“ sapa lipat kain pelekat ayah nih ?” his eyes pointing to his ‘kain pelekat’ neatly folded and hung on the racks.
“ kak lipatkan td. 'Bakpo nyo' ( kenapa nya ) ?” I asked, wondering to myself as I looked at the ‘kain pelekat’, ‘buruk sgt ke aku lipat ?’..eheh.
“ oohh..takde, sebab nampak lain, jadi ayah tahulah bukan mama yg lipat. ..” As he said this, he walked out from the room. Leaving me still looking at the ‘kain pelekat’, comparing it to the one folded by my mom hung next to it which looked not much different from the one i did. Silently amazed at the fact that my father could notice that.Wow.

Hmm..looks like my parents are ‘the perfect match’ too..=]

02 February 2006

balik asrama semua..!

hari 'balik asrama'. Like usual, the same, chaotic situation in my house ..

"..ehh..mana stokin Bie?..sapa curi stokin Bie?!..err, ni stokin BIe ke..? "
"..Arrggh..malasnya nak balik sekolah..!!"
"...Weihh..cepatlah kemas barang2 tuh masuk beg, ..nak pergi lepas Zuhur nih, takut lewat nanti.."
"....berkubangnya kat sini..ni brg sapa nih?..jgn sepah2 nanti bercampur dgn barang org lain.."
"Sapa punya turn gosok baju..?!"

Dialog sama sejak dulu, dari zaman aku, kakak dan Imah..hinggalah ke time adik2 sekarang nih. Situasi yg sama. Eheh..just sekarang aku jd pemerhati je, lucu tgk gelagat adik2 berkemas balik sekolah. Time aku dulu lagi teruk, ..eheh. Dan ayat yg sama akan keluar dr mulut ayah, "...ha..sapa nak pergi dulu nih..?". Dan semua dh mcm faham2 sendiri, yg jauh akan pergi dulu, in our case, org yg bersekolah di Neg Sembilan. Yg syok org yg belajar kat SMAKL, pukul 5 baru bertolak. Dan ayah, dari anak yg sulung hingga bungsu, semua dia yg hantar balik asrama, tak kiralah kat Seremban ke, Hulu Langat ke, Kajang ke, KL ke. Dari kereta Ford LAser buruk ( yg seusia dgn aku tuh..=]) hinggalah ke kereta sekarang, bnyk benar jasa kereta2 tu kat kitorg...Aku ingat Imah pernah tnya ayah.., masa tu dia IB di Kolej MAra BAnting..
Imah : "..ayah..biarlah imah balik sendiri..susahlah ayah jauh2 nak drive. Imah reti balik sendiri.."

Ayah :"..tak payahla,..ayah boleh ambil hantar. Masa kamu semua masih bawah ayah nilah, ayah boleh nak mengambil menghantar. Esok2 dah jadi hak orang, dah ade suami..ayah dah tak boleh nak ambil dh.."
Terus Imah diam.

Mama pun tak kurg ligatnya. Dr pagi dh bergegas untuk siap2kan makan awal, sbb kena bertolak awal. Nak pastikan semua brg2 anak2nya ada. Yg penting, bekalan makanan, yg kdg2 aku terfikir, apa mama ingat anak2 dia kebulur kat asrama kot, punyalah bnyk mcm nak buat bekal utk batallion askar...ehehe. Setiap kali nak balik asrama, mama akan minta semua buat list brg2 yg diperlukan utk dia pergi beli. ,. .common request, 'ubat gigi', 'sabun', kadang2 'cermin muka'. ( ini satu hal lagi, adik2 aku ni punya list, ..isshh...mcm2 )

dan bila semua dh balik, tinggallah mama dan ayah, serta anak2 yg dh habis sekolah. Dari gelak ketawa riuh2 suasana dalam rumah semasa semua berkumpul, jadi sgt senyap dan hening. Sunyi je. iSkk...

Sebenarnya..im missing my adik2 yg baru balik asrama smlm..tu yg 'sentimental' semacam je nih..hAihh...