14 February 2006

why so 'blue'..?

feeling blue....hmm. dunno what's wrong with me, ..keep drifting to 'dreamland'...

it rained heavily today, with lightnings that woke me up from my afternoon sleep. A wake from God, as i haven't perform my Zohor prayers yet..And later, spend the entire evening with Harry Potter, laughing at the wits and enjoying the wonderful adventure of wizardry. ( Naz,naz..u still can 'goyang2' ur kaki mehh..? )

interview went well. Unexpectedly too easy and smooth i must say, as we were warned about the 'worst' cases and experiences, and we got ourselves prepared for this day mcmlah nak ambil exam. (a friend of mine siap gi beli buku 'Malaysia Kita'..now that's seriously serious..eheh). But, today..everything was totally different from what was told to us by the 'juru-taklimat' ( which i thought was really exaggerating this whole interview stuffs, ...what, trying to scare us agaknye..?). The interviewers were very kind ppl,( 'veteran' ppl who reminds me very much of my own father ) asking simple questions about ourselves, teased me playfully about my reluctance to be posted to sab & swak. ( ehhe..couldn't pretend my 'tak nak' expression,..maaflah DAtuk.. i had other plans in mind..;] ). Almost all the minutes spent listening to him giving me wise words, advising me to be a good human being, not to be arrogant and serve the nation as a good civilian. Basically, i was nodding like an obedient daughter throughout the interview session as he did most of the talking. But..alhamdulillah...whatever the result of this, i know it would be the best ., yeap, the odds are against me, looking at the slim chances for me to get my choices granted.

not that i despise 'sabah & swak' that much, not at all. Cuma, dlm kepala, mcm2 plan ada. Nak berada hampir dgn keluarga esp parents not due to 'manja-ness' or what, but more because i know that it would make them very happy, being surrounded with their anak2. And most importantly, that would be the only time i have, to really be their daughter. To be there for them, spend time together etc. Before the time comes,when ill be someone's wife and only Allah knows, where ill be starting my new life later. It's the cycle of life, im not complaining, knowing that's how life is ..it just that, as long as i can use the time i have, and the opportunity to make choices..ermm, ill try my best to do what i could.

and besides..=]... it's about time for me to really seriously thinking about my life. About ending this 'single-hood' life of mine and embark on a new journey. A new life. insyaAllah..


faruq said...

good to hear the interview went mighty fine =3. no worries on the postign location, yea? i'm pretty sure it'll turn out just the way you want it XD.

justme said...

=]..hope so..